Hey look, this girl likes you but I think you should fall in love with the bitch that doesn't like you at all.

Hey look, this girl likes you but I think you should fall in love with the bitch that doesn't like you at all.  - Hey look, this girl likes you but I think you should fall in love with the bitch that doesn't like you at all.   Scumbag Brain

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Can effortlessly learn any language But only while you're too young to care.

Can effortlessly learn any language But only while you're too young to care.

Has earned 2 bachelors, a masters, and a doctorate Needs to sing the alphabet to remember where J goes

Has earned 2 bachelors, a masters, and a doctorate Needs to sing the alphabet to remember where J goes

Gets inspired to work out, study hard, and turn my life around 1 Am

Gets inspired to work out, study hard, and turn my life around 1 Am

Hey, remember that thing your boyfriend did six months ago? He should be in trouble for that again.

Hey, remember that thing your boyfriend did six months ago? He should be in trouble for that again.

oh, the food is too hot for your hand? quick, put it in your mouth

oh, the food is too hot for your hand? quick, put it in your mouth

Did you just turn that test in? Because I finally figured out how to solve that problem and man, did you fuck up.

Did you just turn that test in? Because I finally figured out how to solve that problem and man, did you fuck up.

At a funeral. remembers funniest joke you ever heard.

At a funeral. remembers funniest joke you ever heard.

oh, your alarm went off. let's brush your teeth and get dressed in a dream

oh, your alarm went off. let's brush your teeth and get dressed in a dream

It's your first day off in months and all you want to do is sleep-in? 5:30 am it is

It's your first day off in months and all you want to do is sleep-in? 5:30 am it is

Dead tired at 8AM on weekdays after a full nights sleep Wide awake at 8AM on weekends after insufficient sleep

Dead tired at 8AM on weekdays after a full nights sleep Wide awake at 8AM on weekends after insufficient sleep
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