give old lady my seat on a packed train, cute girl I'm now standing next to gives me her phone number. meet up with cute girl, have sex. She steals my wallet and gives me herpes

give old lady my seat on a packed train, cute girl I'm now standing next to gives me her phone number.
 meet up with cute girl, have sex.  She steals my wallet and gives me herpes - give old lady my seat on a packed train, cute girl I'm now standing next to gives me her phone number.
 meet up with cute girl, have sex.  She steals my wallet and gives me herpes  Socially Awkward Penguin

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"Sorry bro I really can't make it to your wedding.." "Perhapes next time"

went to hockey game with sister got on kiss cam

went to hockey game with sister got on kiss cam

Start same sentence 3 times someone talks over you every time

Start same sentence 3 times someone talks over you every time

Has imaginary argument in head Makes corresponding facial expressions and looks insane

Has imaginary argument in head Makes corresponding facial expressions and looks insane

After 45 minutes alone in a restaurant a waiter kindly told me i'd been stood up I was waiting for my family

After 45 minutes alone in a restaurant a waiter kindly told me i'd been stood up I was waiting for my family

Didnt ask gfs parents what to call them two years later, still just talks in their direction

Didnt ask gfs parents what to call them two years later, still just talks in their direction

notices a girl's whistle and ask if it's a rape whistle. she says yes. asks "does it work?"

notices a girl's whistle and ask if it's a rape whistle. she says yes. asks

Proud Atheist Name is jesus

Proud Atheist Name is jesus

the awkward moment when your sarcasm is so advanced people actually think you are stupid

the awkward moment when your sarcasm is so advanced people actually think you are stupid

Tries to compliment female colleague "there are fatter girls than you"

Tries to compliment female colleague
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