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Socially Awkward Penguin

penguin hates these freaking idiots

YOUR CONSERVATIVE HERO PUNDITS ARE A BUNCH OF PHONIES(MOST). BUNCH OF HYPOCRITE MUPPETS IN THE USA. WILL DO ANYTHING PASTOR PETE TELLS THEM TO. LIKE GET RAPPED. OR RAPE KIDS BECAUSE PASTORS WANT DIRT ON YOU. Socially Awkward Penguin
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139 shares

for the record penguin

IF THE MILITARY WANTS TO GET RID OF SOMEONE WITH PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY WHY SHOULD THEY HAVE A BAD REPUTATION FOR TRYING TO LEAVE THE MILITARY WITH PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY Socially Awkward Penguin
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146 shares

penguin the penguineer

COMPETITIONS WON 1. WHO CAN GET PSYCH TORTURED THE BEST 2. WHO HANDLES RAT POISON THE BEST 3. WHO IS THE BEST AT DBAG CHICKEN Socially Awkward Penguin
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192 shares

penguin is settin some suggestions

OKAY FRIEND ZONING NUMBER ZWEI. TO FRIENDZONE SOMEONE YOU ACTUALLY HAVE TO TALK TO THEM SO, HEY IF YOU WANA PROVE EYE'M A SLEEZEBAG THEN BRING IT. EVERYTHING EYE DO IS A COMPETITION ANYWAYS. SO YEAH EYE WANA BE FRIENDS WITH VOLCOM MODEL. NO OTHER BAGS. THE GOV IS NOT GOING TO LET THIS HAPPEN THOUGH................SO.................YOU GOTA Socially Awkward Penguin
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102 shares

penguin hates these dweebuses

OKAY TYPICAL DBAG COMEBACK FOR NUMBER 2 NUMBER2 MEANS POOP RIGHT. THAT'S ALL THEY GOT. THAT'S HOW THEY HECKLE PEOPLE. IT'S ELEMENTARY SCHOOL HECKLING. WE'LL JUST SAY NUMBER ZWEI, SO THESE GAP MODELS DON'T GET CONFUSED. I'D RATHER BANG A VOLCOM MODEL. BUT YEAH EYEM MARRIED SOO.............HEY U Socially Awkward Penguin
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144 shares

penguin the penguin

ADVICE TO NUMBER 2 DON'T TAKE ANYTHING SERIOUS. ALL THE GAP MODELS ARE PRETTY MUCH NIGHT STALKERISH. JUST CONFUSED IDIOTS WAITING TO POUNCE ON ANY LITTLE PIECE OF GARBAGE. NUMBER 2 IS A VOLCOM MODEL. IT'S A THOUSAND TIMES BETTER THAN A GAP MODEL. SHE'S GOT POTENTIAL THOUGH. Socially Awkward Penguin
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142 shares

penguin settin everyone straight

THE DUMBEST THING THIS(USA) COUNTRY EVER DID SPY WISE WAS TO HIRE A BUNCH OF GAP MODELS TO BE JERKS TO EVERYONE AND DO SPY STUFF WITH PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY Socially Awkward Penguin
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159 shares

you can do it number 2

ADVICE FOR NUMBER 2 DON'T ASSOCIATE WITH THE GAP MUPPETS. ONLY ASSOCIATE WITH ZMONEY. YOU DON'T HAVE TO BANG HIM. HE'S NOT A GAP MODEL LIKE THE REST OF THOSE IDIOTS, AND NEITHER ARE YOU. BEING HECKLED BY A GAP MODEL IS INFURIATING CAUSE ITS THE DUMBEST THING ON THE PLANET AN Socially Awkward Penguin
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183 shares

penguin the man

EYE GOTA MENTOR NUMBER 2 BUT I'M STILL MARRIED TO NUMBER ONE IS EVERYONE COOL WITH THIS? SOMEONE NEEDS TO TELL HER SOMETHING INTELLIGENT INSTEAD OF LYING TO HER. Socially Awkward Penguin
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249 shares

penguin open for biz

OKAY GOT A JOB FOR ALL THE BAGS DESTROY EVERY CASP ON THE PLANET. THEN I'LL CONSIDER BEING DIRECTOR. FIRST THING THAT GOES IS THIS MUPPET GARBAGE. NO REPEATER GAMES. Socially Awkward Penguin
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130 shares