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Actual Advice Mallard

DUCK!

DUCK! Actual Advice Mallard
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Emoticons read top-down from left to right. Like so: :-) I don't even know what the fuck this is: (: Stop that.

Emoticons read top-down from left to right. Like so: :-) I don't even know what the fuck this is: (: Stop that. Actual Advice Mallard
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Want to eat salad without worrying about dressing intake? Try dipping your fork into a small cup of dressing as you eat.

Want to eat salad without worrying about dressing intake? Try dipping your fork into a small cup of dressing as you eat. Actual Advice Mallard
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A Cakeday is not your birthday It is the day you joined reddit

A Cakeday is not your birthday It is the day you joined reddit Actual Advice Mallard
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If you want free thumbtacks Visit a well-traveled intersection and take them from the telephone pole

If you want free thumbtacks Visit a well-traveled intersection and take them from the telephone pole Actual Advice Mallard
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Run out of laundry soap often? Buy an extra bottle in a scent you dont like. You'll never be out of soap - just in case - but washing your clothes with a scent you don't like will incentivize you to restock soon.

Run out of laundry soap often? Buy an extra bottle in a scent you dont like. You'll never be out of soap - just in case - but washing your clothes with a scent you don't like will incentivize you to restock soon. Actual Advice Mallard
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remember they're people, too

remember they're people, too Actual Advice Mallard
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If you really counted 10 million cheerios You should get a girlfriend

If you really counted 10 million cheerios You should get a girlfriend Actual Advice Mallard
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If you're contemplating suicide Avoid driving through a Sam's Club parking lot

If you're contemplating suicide Avoid driving through a Sam's Club parking lot Actual Advice Mallard
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When you don't want to talk about it Never tell whomever is asking "I don't want to talk about it"

When you don't want to talk about it Never tell whomever is asking
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