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Actual Advice Mallard

always jerk off before any public event nothing ruins a public event like a solid boner.

always jerk off before any public event nothing ruins a public event like a solid boner. Actual Advice Mallard
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make sure you get all the facts right or else you will look like an idiot on tv

make sure you get all the facts right or else you will look like an idiot on tv Actual Advice Mallard
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you have to slay a few dragons to get to the princess

you have to slay a few dragons to get to the princess Actual Advice Mallard
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Can't sneeze? Look at a bright Light and you will Sneeze

Can't sneeze? Look at a bright Light and you will Sneeze Actual Advice Mallard
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if you want to be productive you should stay off reddit

if you want to be productive you should stay off reddit Actual Advice Mallard
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If your school called off tomorrow Do your homework tonight so you can enjoy your full snow day tomorrow

If your school called off tomorrow Do your homework tonight so you can enjoy your full snow day tomorrow Actual Advice Mallard
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Keep admitting your crimes using confession bear. Just make sure the statute of limitations has passed.

Keep admitting your crimes using confession bear. Just make sure the statute of limitations has passed. Actual Advice Mallard
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don't take advice from a duck

don't take advice from a duck Actual Advice Mallard
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If you leave men obvious hints WE WON'T GET IT

If you leave men obvious hints WE WON'T GET IT Actual Advice Mallard
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If your wife or girlfriend is working and you're home being lazy all day. Start the dishwasher just before she gets home. It makes it look like you have been cleaning.

If your wife or girlfriend is working and you're home being lazy all day. Start the dishwasher just before she gets home. It makes it look like you have been cleaning. Actual Advice Mallard
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