Actual Advice Mallard

always jerk off before any public event nothing ruins a public event like a solid boner.

always jerk off before any public event nothing ruins a public event like a solid boner.  Actual Advice Mallard

make sure you get all the facts right or else you will look like an idiot on tv

make sure you get all the facts right or else you will look like an idiot on tv  Actual Advice Mallard

you have to slay a few dragons to get to the princess

you have to slay a few dragons to get to the princess   Actual Advice Mallard

Can't sneeze? Look at a bright Light and you will Sneeze

Can't sneeze? Look at a bright Light and you will Sneeze  Actual Advice Mallard

if you want to be productive you should stay off reddit

if you want to be productive you should stay off reddit  Actual Advice Mallard

If your school called off tomorrow Do your homework tonight so you can enjoy your full snow day tomorrow

If your school called off tomorrow Do your homework tonight so you can enjoy your full snow day tomorrow  Actual Advice Mallard

Keep admitting your crimes using confession bear. Just make sure the statute of limitations has passed.

Keep admitting your crimes using confession bear. Just make sure the statute of limitations has passed.  Actual Advice Mallard

don't take advice from a duck

don't take advice  from a duck  Actual Advice Mallard

If you leave men obvious hints WE WON'T GET IT

If you leave men obvious hints WE WON'T GET IT  Actual Advice Mallard

If your wife or girlfriend is working and you're home being lazy all day. Start the dishwasher just before she gets home. It makes it look like you have been cleaning.

If your wife or girlfriend is working and you're home being lazy all day.  Start the dishwasher just before she gets home. It makes it look like you have been cleaning.   Actual Advice Mallard
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