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Actual Advice Mallard
if your printer's colored ink is running low and you need just a page or two more remove the ink cartridge and shake it
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Poop Before you work out
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Go for Overweight women
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Try running or lifting It will get your mind off of things, plus you will look and feel better as a result
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EAT ANYTHING YOU WANT EXCEPT THE CHICKEN NUGGETS
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If you aren't elderly or handicapped Park at the far end of the parking lot you can use a little more walking, and your car is less likely to get scratched
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Tired of poopsplash when on the toilet? Put a layer of toilet paper on the surface of the water beforehand
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be careful not to bitch too much sometimes the squeaky wheel gets grease, sometimes it gets replaced
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If you're homeless Ask at your gym if you can use the internet to research advice
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Be honest Don't tell lies