Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

open elevator door before it closes for cute girl rushing to the door forgot you had farted beforehand

open elevator door before it closes for cute girl rushing to the door  forgot you had farted beforehand  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

goes in for the first kiss at the movies during a rape scene

goes in for the first kiss at the movies during a rape scene  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Wins bingo terrified of being the center of attention

Wins bingo terrified of being the center of attention  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Sees a cute girl in time to eat a mint. Chokes on it trying to say "hi."

Sees a cute girl in time to eat a mint.  Chokes on it trying to say

Girls like me to stay far away from them

Girls like me to stay far away from them  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Asks cute girl to the movies Has tickets to Star Wars

Asks cute girl to the movies Has tickets to Star Wars  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Brings two girls home from the bar Sleeps on the couch

Brings two girls home from the bar Sleeps on the couch  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

goes home with fellow redditor first thing she does is show me her 357 magnum

goes home with fellow redditor first thing she does is show me her 357 magnum  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

runs into old friend and asks "hows your son doing?" "he died"

runs into old friend and asks

Whiskey. Straight. No Chaser. Down the wrong pipe.

Whiskey. Straight. No Chaser. Down the wrong pipe.  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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