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I thought my cousin could use a laugh, so i went up to her and said "why do lesbians go to modells?" she asked why, then i answered "cause they dont like dicks!!" she beat me up with her man bag then called animal control on me. FUCKIN WORTH IT!

I thought my cousin could use a laugh, so i went up to her and said
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106 shares

Is ignored at work for being socially awkward and shy is treated overly nice by co-workers after mass shootings

Is ignored at work for being socially awkward and shy is treated overly nice by co-workers after mass shootings
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681,517 shares

I have imaginary friends But they only talk to each other.

I have imaginary friends But they only talk to each other.
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627,778 shares

One night stand "that's all the storage space I'll need."

One night stand
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420,900 shares

i'm not attractive enough for the real world or clever enough for the internet

i'm not attractive enough for the real world or clever enough for the internet
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360,699 shares

First words of the day spoken 6 hours after waking up

First words of the day spoken 6 hours after waking up
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352,200 shares

Have you had sex with... NO

Have you had sex with... NO
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351,013 shares

You overestimate my powers

You overestimate my powers
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348,149 shares

parents tell you not to have parties while they're on vacation no problem

parents tell you not to have parties while they're on vacation no problem
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334,401 shares

Make Awesome new ringtone don't hear it for two weeks

Make Awesome new ringtone don't hear it for two weeks
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307,093 shares

Forgot to put phone on silent at the movie theater Didn't matter

Forgot to put phone on silent at the movie theater Didn't matter
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283,022 shares

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