Actual Advice Mallard

even if you think you are alone...

ALWAYS ACT LIKE SOMEONE IS WATCHING YOU BECAUSE SOMEONE LITERALLY MIGHT BE WATCHING YOU Actual Advice Mallard

REVERSE TABBING!

IF YOU HOLD SHIFT WHILE HITTING TAB YOU WILL TAB UP OR BACKWARD Actual Advice Mallard

Babysitting cousins this week...

BE CREATIVE WITH YOUR CHILDREN'S FOOD AND PREPARE IT IN FRONT OF THEM THEY'LL BE MUCH MORE INCLINED TO EAT IT Actual Advice Mallard

Don't give the video over to him in the first place...You never know what might happen if you guys break up

IF YOUR BOYFRIEND ASSURES YOU THAT HE HAS DELETED THE SEXY VIDEO YOU RECORDED TOGETHER DON'T BELIEVE HIM  Actual Advice Mallard

Nurses are very busy people

IF YOU ARE WAITING FOR SOMEONE IN THE ER AND SEE A PERSON ALONE AND CRYING. OFFER TO GET THEM A CUP OF COFFEE OR WATER, IT WILL HELP TAKE YOUR MIND OFF THE REASON YOU ARE WAITING THERE Actual Advice Mallard

Am I doin it right?

IF YOU LEAVE MILK OUT, IT CAN GO SOUR. PUT IT IN THE REFRIGERATOR, OR, FAILING THAT, A COOL WET SACK. Actual Advice Mallard

guilt your mother

IF YOU KILL A MAN IN FRONT OF YOUR MOTHER YOU SOHULD PROBABLY GUILT TRIP HER FOR MARRYING HER OLD HUSBAND'S MURDERER Actual Advice Mallard

As a salesperson today, try buying online instead.

JUST BECAUSE IT'S BLACK FRIDAY DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE GOING TO GET A GOOD DEAL Actual Advice Mallard

Winter BBQ Advice

IF IT'S REALLY COLD OUTSIDE AND YOUR BBQ WONT START, THE REGULATOR IS PROBABLY FROZEN PUT A CLOTH UNDER HOT WATER THEN WRAP IT WROUND THE REGUALTOR AND IT WILL FIRE RIGHT AWAY Actual Advice Mallard

work faster than complaint on other ways

DISSATISFIED WITH A SERVICE? POST COMPLAINT ON THE FACEBOOK WALL OF THE BUSINESS Actual Advice Mallard