Actual Advice Mallard

Badass Duck

A HUNTER TRIED TO KILL ME AND MISSED ALL EIGHT SHOTS. QUACK QUACK! MOTHAFUCKA Actual Advice Mallard

Kinda Fishy

I'M A FISH.                    CALL ME A DUCK ONE MORE TIME... Actual Advice Mallard

Advice Malard Says SO

KEEP YOUR FRIDGE CLOSED ALWAYS  BUT ESPECIALLY FOR BREAK  Actual Advice Mallard

Montucky Sucks

WHY DO DUCKS FLY UPSIDE DOWN OVER MONTANA THERE'S NOTHING WORTH CRAPPING ON Actual Advice Mallard

CHICA ROMPECORAZONES

CUANDO UNA CHICA TE ROMPA EL CORAZÓN TIENES QUE MANTENER TU MENTE OCUPADA EN ALGO QUE TE GUSTEN, DEPORTE O VIDEOJUEGO. ESO AYUDARÁ A SUPERAR TODO Actual Advice Mallard

Duck Dynasty Y'ALL

QUACK QUACK QUACK  DUCK DYNASTY CLUB @ 19 BATTEN DR. AT 7:30PM Actual Advice Mallard

If you don't know what to do.

IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO SO DO NOTHING  AND PUT THE GUILTY IN SOMEONE ELSE. Actual Advice Mallard

Try it. Builds confidence aswell

BEFORE GOING OUT ON A DATE GO TO THE GYM AND BREAK A SWEAT. YOU WONT GET PIT STAINS AND YOU WILL HAVE MORE ENERGY.  Actual Advice Mallard

How to always eat fresh fries at mcdonalds

WANT MCDONALDS TO COOK YOUR FRIES AT THE TIME OF YOUR ORDER? ASK FOR NO SALT. THEY WILL MAKE YOU A FRESH BATCH SINCE THE ONES THEY HAVE ARE ALREADY SALTED. Actual Advice Mallard

After another of those fucking friendzone posts.

GIRLS ARE NOT ATTRACTED TO WHINING BITCHES GROW SOME BALLS Actual Advice Mallard