Actual Advice Mallard

Quit Begging!

IF YOU WANT LOYALTY POINTS FOR HANDING IN CONTRABAND RADIO IT IN FIRST AND DON'T ASK FOR POINTS Actual Advice Mallard

ha ahah na na na

RUMOUR HAS IT, HELENA'S ARE BAD PEOPLE TRUE Actual Advice Mallard

For my brother

IF YOU DECIDE TO PLAY A PRANK ON YOUR OLDER BROTHER... ...YOU SHOULD EXPECT THEM TO DO THE SAME, EXCEPT BETTER. Actual Advice Mallard

i'll try

IF YOU WANT YOUR CAR CONSTANTLY GLOSSY NEVER USE CAR SHAMPOO, JUST WASH WITH WATER Actual Advice Mallard

Gum flavor memory

CHEW GUM WITH A SPECIFIC FLAVOR WHILE STUDYING  CHEW GUM WITH THE SAME FLAVOR DURING THE TEST TO HELP YOU REMEMBER Actual Advice Mallard

When you go out to eat (or drink) keep this in mind

ALWAYS BE CONSIDERATE AND SPEAK POLITELY TO YOUR SERVER. IN RETURN THEY WILL WORK HARDER TO KEEP YOU HAPPY. Actual Advice Mallard

Procrastination or Not

U SHOULD ALWAYS PLAN YOUR TIME OR AT LEAST FINISH HALF OF WAT U HAD TO DO Actual Advice Mallard

Eating Messy Chips

IF EATING MESSY CHIPS LIKE CHEETOS, PUT THEM ON A PLATE, YOUR FINGERS WON'T GET AS MESSY B/C YOU AREN'T FUMBLING AROUND. Actual Advice Mallard

oh that cosby duck of mine

BIP BOP  BOOBDIBOP Actual Advice Mallard

LOOK AT MY FUCKING POST GD IT QUICK MEME I HATE YOUR FACE

DON'T SERVE ASPARAGUS AT A DINNER PARTY YOUR BATHROOM WILL STINK Actual Advice Mallard