Actual Advice Mallard

Just don't

IF YOU AREN'T FINANCIALLY STABLE NOW, DON'T GET ENGAGED OR TRY TO HAVE A CHILD Actual Advice Mallard

To think or not to think

THINK WITH AN OPEN MIND NOT WITH A OPEN MOUTH Actual Advice Mallard

How to think 101

THINK WITH AN OPEN MIND NOT WITH AN OPEN MOUTH Actual Advice Mallard

Advice on memes

MAKE MEMES SHORT AND TO THE POINT PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE READING LONG SENTENCES WITH A LOT OF UNNECESSARY INFORMATION THAT DO NOT REALLY ADD TO THE POINT YOU ARE TRYING TO GET ACROSS Actual Advice Mallard

...hue hue hue

DO YOU WANT TO  WIN ?  DON'T LET MIMO PLAY TOPLANE Actual Advice Mallard

Dont have a Costco card?

DON'T HAVE A COSTCO CARD? GET A GIFT CARD AND USE IT. Actual Advice Mallard

Some people learn it the hard way

IF YOU DON'T ALWAYS WORK AT YOUR FULL POTENTIAL YOU'LL EVENTUALLY REGRET IT Actual Advice Mallard

Breakup Advice

WHEN GOING THROUGH A BREAKUP, DON'T STOP LISTENING TO THE SONGS THAT REMIND YOU OF HER THEY'LL EVENTUALLY STOP REMINDING YOU Actual Advice Mallard

If the mallard tells you to exercise in Finnish again...

JOS HALUAT NÄYTTÄÄ HYVÄLTÄ HARRASTA LIIKUNTAA Actual Advice Mallard

If the mallard tells you to exercise in Finnish...

JOS HALUAT PYSYÄ TERVEENÄ HARRASTA LIIKUNTAA Actual Advice Mallard