Philosoraptor

ELDER STODDARD HAS A BIRTHDAY!

ELDER STODDARD - JUST IMAGINE THE THINGS YOU’D WANT TO HEAR ON YOUR BIRTHDAY AND ASSUME I SAID THEM. HAPPY B-DAY Philosoraptor

Guest verbally tips you, only tips 10%

DO YOU PAY YOUR BILLS WITH COMPLIMENTS? NEITHER DO I..... Philosoraptor

I wonder why

IF AMERICA PRINTS THEIR OWN MONEY WHY ARE THEY IN DEBT? Philosoraptor

So turned on

KNOWING THAT I TURN YOU ON IS ACTUALLY A HUGE TURN-OFF FOR ME Philosoraptor

So turned on

KNOWING I TURN YOU ON IS A HUGE TURN OFF Philosoraptor

herp derp123

IF I WIN THE INTERNET AND YOU'RE ON IT.. DOES THAT MEAN I WIN YOU? Philosoraptor

masistas otra vez

SI LOS MASISTAS QUIEREN

creative thinking

IF I RUN BACKWARDS AS FAST AS I WALK FORWARD DOES THAT MEAN I CAN JUMP ON A POGO STICK TO CREATE A SPOON TO EAT YOUR POOP WITH?  Philosoraptor

I'm not creative

IF YOU PUT AN AUSTRALIAN IN CHECK IS HE IN CHECK, MATE? Philosoraptor

jacob zuma

NINE HUNDRED THOUSAND AND 39 MILLION Philosoraptor