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Actual Advice Mallard

Don't put plastic in the oven and don't put metal in the microwave

Don't put plastic in the oven and don't put metal in the microwave Actual Advice Mallard
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if she/he doesn't love you back, then she/he is not your fucking one true love. you fucking dipshit. Jesus fucking H. christ, Are you kidding me? go kiss your husband/wife and tell them, "thanks for loving me." God damn, quit being a little bitch.

if she/he doesn't love you back, then she/he is not your fucking one true love. you fucking dipshit. Jesus fucking H. christ, Are you kidding me? go kiss your husband/wife and tell them,
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At the dentist, pay attention to where they spend the most time scraping your teeth This tells you what spots you are missing when you brush

At the dentist, pay attention to where they spend the most time scraping your teeth This tells you what spots you are missing when you brush Actual Advice Mallard
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paper not long enough? increase the font size of your periods. it will add a little extra space between sentences.

paper not long enough? increase the font size of your periods. it will add a little extra space between sentences. Actual Advice Mallard
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When your children become ducks Let them decide if they're ducks or not

When your children become ducks Let them decide if they're ducks or not Actual Advice Mallard
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NEVER trust a fart when you are sick

NEVER trust a fart when you are sick Actual Advice Mallard
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In order to better understand the truth and details behind the Boston events Ignore all media bs for the next month and then form an opinion

In order to better understand the truth and details behind the Boston events Ignore all media bs for the next month and then form an opinion Actual Advice Mallard
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If you think they can hear you They probably can

If you think they can hear you They probably can Actual Advice Mallard
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if something terrible happens wait at least 24 hours before watching the news. They'll get their facts straight by then.

if something terrible happens wait at least 24 hours before watching the news. They'll get their facts straight by then. Actual Advice Mallard
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Make a list of what you want in a future partner if you get into a break up It helps with coping and moving on

Make a list of what you want in a future partner if you get into a break up It helps with coping and moving on Actual Advice Mallard
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