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Actual Advice Mallard

Wash your hands before you pee Your hands are dirty not your penis

Wash your hands before you pee Your hands are dirty not your penis Actual Advice Mallard
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If you don't want to get divorced marry your best friend

If you don't want to get divorced marry your best friend Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't Shave your balls ever

Don't Shave your balls ever Actual Advice Mallard
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If you are a mediocre artist start decorating cakes and tons of people will think you are amazingly talented

If you are a mediocre artist start decorating cakes and tons of people will think you are amazingly talented Actual Advice Mallard
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If you eat lots of fruit You'll be able to poop

If you eat lots of fruit You'll be able to poop Actual Advice Mallard
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If a girl tells you that you don't have to wear a condom don't have sex with her

If a girl tells you that you don't have to wear a condom don't have sex with her Actual Advice Mallard
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LASER PRINTER INK FADING? TAKE OUT THE TONER AND SHAKE IT

LASER PRINTER INK FADING? TAKE OUT THE TONER AND SHAKE IT Actual Advice Mallard
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If you're going to quit your job, give your employer notice Otherwise, your "Friends" have to cover your fucking shifts and now we all hate you... ass

If you're going to quit your job, give your employer notice Otherwise, your
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when txting an address, send it in a SEPARATE MSG. easier for them to copy and paste or open directly in GPS apps.

when txting an address, send it in a SEPARATE MSG. easier for them to copy and paste or open directly in GPS apps. Actual Advice Mallard
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If you start recognising reposts GO OUTSIDE !

If you start recognising reposts GO OUTSIDE ! Actual Advice Mallard
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