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Actual Advice Mallard

If you can't have girl-friends you can't have girlfriends

If you can't have girl-friends you can't have girlfriends Actual Advice Mallard
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You don't have a real beard until you eat dead bugs from it.

You don't have a real beard until you eat dead bugs from it. Actual Advice Mallard
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picking at your face makes matters worse

picking at your face makes matters worse Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't cash a birthday or graduation check Before calling or writing to say thank you.

Don't cash a birthday or graduation check Before calling or writing to say thank you. Actual Advice Mallard
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If your credit/debit card is starting to become demagnetized put a piece of scotch tape along the magnetic strip. Your card will continue to work until you get a new one

If your credit/debit card is starting to become demagnetized put a piece of scotch tape along the magnetic strip. Your card will continue to work until you get a new one Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't start smoking just because it makes you look cool You will regret it and you won't feel cool when you get lung cancer

Don't start smoking just because it makes you look cool You will regret it and you won't feel cool when you get lung cancer Actual Advice Mallard
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if your roommate doesn't wash their dishes for days, don't do the dishes for them they will realize that you will eventually clean up after them and will never do the dishes again

if your roommate doesn't wash their dishes for days, don't do the dishes for them they will realize that you will eventually clean up after them and will never do the dishes again Actual Advice Mallard
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When life gives you lemons Just say "fuck the lemons" and bail

When life gives you lemons Just say
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When golfing, if you don't know how far you are away from the hole, find a sprinkler head they are placed every 20-30 yards apart and usually say how far away you are

When golfing, if you don't know how far you are away from the hole, find a sprinkler head they are placed every 20-30 yards apart and usually say how far away you are Actual Advice Mallard
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flashing to highbeam : caution / you go first turning on and off : you forgot your lights

flashing to highbeam : caution / you go first turning on and off : you forgot your lights Actual Advice Mallard
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