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Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Raising two toddlers Just slipped and told my boss I have to use the "potty"

Raising two toddlers Just slipped and told my boss I have to use the
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Dreams of a clever post that makes it to the front page too scared to post since it was a repost even in the dream

Dreams of a clever post that makes it to the front page too scared to post since it was a repost even in the dream Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Customer asks for the store number so she can commend me to the manager Months later realize you gave her the wrong number

Customer asks for the store number so she can commend me to the manager Months later realize you gave her the wrong number Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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girlfriend says she wants to watch star wars complains when jar jar isn't in the movie

girlfriend says she wants to watch star wars complains when jar jar isn't in the movie Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Kissing a girl on second date, my hand on her boob Finding out she's a virgin

Kissing a girl on second date, my hand on her boob Finding out she's a virgin Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Buys a few friends food "we'll get 5$ foot longs, and everyone gets six inches"

Buys a few friends food
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Working at drive-thru saying "thank you sir please pull forward" Seeing that you were talking to a woman

Working at drive-thru saying
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Finally find some facebook gold it's someone making me look like an idiot on my own status

Finally find some facebook gold it's someone making me look like an idiot on my own status Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Cute girl smiles at you give her the duck face

Cute girl smiles at you give her the duck face Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Elated not to have a "micro-penis" sees the word "unfurl"

Elated not to have a
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