Actual Advice Mallard

suave ladies man

SINGLE AND HAVE A CREDIT CARD? HAVE YOUR PET AS YOUR CARD PICTURE FEMALE CASHIERS THINK ITS CUTE AND IT STARTS A CONVERSATION Actual Advice Mallard

Advice for the lonely lads

NEVER SHOW A WOMAN THAT YOU ARE DESPERATE FOR HER ( EVEN IF YOU ARE ) THEY LIKE CONFIDENT MEN, MAKE THEM FEEL GOOD, MAKE THEM LAUGH INSTEAD OF PUTTING THEM IN UGLY SITUATIONS BY TELLING YOUR FEELINGS DIRECTLY Actual Advice Mallard

when you dont have slow motion

IF YOU DONT HAVE SLOW MOTION  DONT FUCKING MAKE THE CLIP SLOW MOTION  Actual Advice Mallard

Wanna met girls on 9gag?

DON'T EVER START WITH

Please. You'll give them a moment of true happiness.

IF YOU THINK THAT A PECK ON THE LIPS IS A FRIENDLY THING AND YOUR BEST FRIEND IS TOTALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU JUST GIVE HIM THAT Actual Advice Mallard

When ordering at a restaurant

DON'T REMOVE INGREDIENTS FROM THE MENU IT'S THERE FOR A REASON Actual Advice Mallard

NEVER EVER!

NEVER WRITE A UNIVERSITY PAPER ABOUT 9GAG YOU WILL NOT FINISH IT IN TIME Actual Advice Mallard

oh too bad you cant shoot me

YOURE TOO BUSY DRIVING A BUS!!  Actual Advice Mallard

Ducks Bowl

CAN YOU HEAR THAT? CRICKETS Actual Advice Mallard

The Bucks and the....

THE BUCKS AND THE....... ONTO THE NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP Actual Advice Mallard