Actual Advice Mallard

pick a college based on academics not athletics unless you're playing

pick a college based on academics not athletics unless you're playing  Actual Advice Mallard

If a nearby fertilizer plant is on fire Get the fuck away because that shit will explode

If a nearby fertilizer plant is on fire Get the fuck away because that shit will explode  Actual Advice Mallard

If you dont masturbate Dont start! It's very addictive.

If you dont masturbate Dont start! It's very addictive.  Actual Advice Mallard

If you're wondering if your gf wants you to go down on her Yes. She does. All the time. Nut up and do it.

If you're wondering if your gf wants you to go down on her Yes. She does. All the time. Nut up and do it.  Actual Advice Mallard

HERE'S MY BIRTHDAY ADVICE: FORGET ABOUT THE PAST. YOU CAN'T CHANGE IT. FORGET ABOUT THE PRESENT. I DIDN'T GET YOU ONE.

HERE'S MY BIRTHDAY ADVICE: FORGET ABOUT THE PAST. YOU CAN'T CHANGE IT.
FORGET ABOUT THE PRESENT.  I DIDN'T GET YOU ONE.  Actual Advice Mallard

Dont Stick your Dick in crazy

Dont Stick your Dick in crazy  Actual Advice Mallard

If you can see hinges, pull to open If not, push

If you can see hinges, pull to open If not, push  Actual Advice Mallard

Don't fucking make your god damn actual advice mallard sound angry It doesn't really fit with the fucking meme and it makes you seem like a bitter asshole

Don't fucking make your god damn actual advice mallard sound angry It doesn't really fit with the fucking meme and it makes you seem like a bitter asshole  Actual Advice Mallard

YOUR HARd drive will eventually die BACK UP YOUR DATA

YOUR HARd drive will  eventually die BACK UP YOUR DATA  Actual Advice Mallard

if you see someone who's backpack is open let them know

if you see someone who's backpack is open let them know  Actual Advice Mallard
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