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Actual Advice Mallard

pick a college based on academics not athletics unless you're playing

pick a college based on academics not athletics unless you're playing Actual Advice Mallard
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If a nearby fertilizer plant is on fire Get the fuck away because that shit will explode

If a nearby fertilizer plant is on fire Get the fuck away because that shit will explode Actual Advice Mallard
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If you dont masturbate Dont start! It's very addictive.

If you dont masturbate Dont start! It's very addictive. Actual Advice Mallard
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If you're wondering if your gf wants you to go down on her Yes. She does. All the time. Nut up and do it.

If you're wondering if your gf wants you to go down on her Yes. She does. All the time. Nut up and do it. Actual Advice Mallard
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HERE'S MY BIRTHDAY ADVICE: FORGET ABOUT THE PAST. YOU CAN'T CHANGE IT. FORGET ABOUT THE PRESENT. I DIDN'T GET YOU ONE.

HERE'S MY BIRTHDAY ADVICE: FORGET ABOUT THE PAST. YOU CAN'T CHANGE IT. FORGET ABOUT THE PRESENT. I DIDN'T GET YOU ONE. Actual Advice Mallard
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Dont Stick your Dick in crazy

Dont Stick your Dick in crazy Actual Advice Mallard
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If you can see hinges, pull to open If not, push

If you can see hinges, pull to open If not, push Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't fucking make your god damn actual advice mallard sound angry It doesn't really fit with the fucking meme and it makes you seem like a bitter asshole

Don't fucking make your god damn actual advice mallard sound angry It doesn't really fit with the fucking meme and it makes you seem like a bitter asshole Actual Advice Mallard
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YOUR HARd drive will eventually die BACK UP YOUR DATA

YOUR HARd drive will eventually die BACK UP YOUR DATA Actual Advice Mallard
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if you see someone who's backpack is open let them know

if you see someone who's backpack is open let them know Actual Advice Mallard
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