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Actual Advice Mallard

if you want to understand every song ever written just get your heart broken

if you want to understand every song ever written just get your heart broken Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't be that person that asks a guitarist "Do you play acoustic or electric?"

Don't be that person that asks a guitarist
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If you "got her at hello" She's probably a slut

If you
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When working in a grocery store Don't let the spider from the banana box run free

When working in a grocery store Don't let the spider from the banana box run free Actual Advice Mallard
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Buy cinnamon gum Your friends wont want it because it's 'too spicy'

Buy cinnamon gum Your friends wont want it because it's 'too spicy' Actual Advice Mallard
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if you need to wake up early sleep with your window curtains and blinds open. your room will be so bright in the morning you wont have a choice but to wake up

if you need to wake up early sleep with your window curtains and blinds open. your room will be so bright in the morning you wont have a choice but to wake up Actual Advice Mallard
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if you use advice mallard. don't give advice which requires common sense.

if you use advice mallard. don't give advice which requires common sense. Actual Advice Mallard
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When eating pussy don't be a pussy

When eating pussy don't be a pussy Actual Advice Mallard
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If you're driving at or below the speed limit and you see a pizza driver behind you Please speed up or pull over and let them pass. They're trying to make money, and more than likely have 3 or 4 places to go and a very short amount of time to get there.

If you're driving at or below the speed limit and you see a pizza driver behind you Please speed up or pull over and let them pass. They're trying to make money, and more than likely have 3 or 4 places to go and a very short amount of time to get there. Actual Advice Mallard
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if someone asks if you want to make some money and then asks if you have a car take how you'd fare in prison into consideration

if someone asks if you want to make some money and then asks if you have a car take how you'd fare in prison into consideration Actual Advice Mallard
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