Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Finally got my infant down for a nap Wasting my time on reddit instead of sleeping myself

Finally got my infant down for a nap Wasting my time on reddit instead of sleeping myself  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Girl enters number into my phone "Who's number is this?"

Girl enters number into my phone

ME: So i drank a bottle of tequila last night. Girl (impressed): a whole fifth? Me: No I think it was like 3/4.

ME: So i drank a bottle of tequila last night.
Girl (impressed): a whole fifth? Me: No I think it was like 3/4.  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Has amazing best friend who just happens to have a boyfriend Ends up hating me because of the rumors people spread saying I like her

Has amazing best friend who just happens to have a boyfriend Ends up hating me because of the rumors people spread saying I like her  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Internet is so fast Makes me Host of all games causing serious lag

Internet is so fast Makes me Host of all games causing serious lag  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Fluently speaks Spanish as a second language gets so nervous it comes out as stutters, stammers & borderline offensive broken English/Spanish

Fluently speaks Spanish as a second language gets so nervous it comes out as stutters, stammers & borderline offensive broken English/Spanish  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Made sure I opened the car door for my date every time just so I could fart while walking around the vehicle to my door.

Made sure I opened the car door for my date every time just so I could fart while walking around the vehicle to my door.  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

REAL LIFE INTERNET

REAL LIFE INTERNET  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

order sandwich FOOTBALL MEATLONG

order sandwich FOOTBALL MEATLONG  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Girlfriend joins reddit Already has more karma than I do

Girlfriend joins reddit Already has more karma than I do  Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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