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Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin

Clears throat before speaking vomits

Clears throat before speaking vomits Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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cute girl tells mutual friend that she would date you "are you sure she didn't mean the other jack"

cute girl tells mutual friend that she would date you
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Gets text message Amazon.com (18-Dec 10:59 AM): The carrier delivered your package.

Gets text message Amazon.com (18-Dec 10:59 AM): The carrier delivered your package. Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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I would totally date you If I didn't friendzone you

I would totally date you If I didn't friendzone you Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Sees cake day coming up Contemplates making another account to avoid it

Sees cake day coming up Contemplates making another account to avoid it Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Crush says she will be happy to come over at the weekend to hang out with me housemate fucks her

Crush says she will be happy to come over at the weekend to hang out with me housemate fucks her Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Intend to say "she's not any prettier than you are" actually say "she's not much prettier than you are"

Intend to say
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Knows the answer to the teacher's question stays silent and waits for someone else to answer

Knows the answer to the teacher's question stays silent and waits for someone else to answer Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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Loses virginity to good looking girl at party had her tampon in the whole time

Loses virginity to good looking girl at party had her tampon in the whole time Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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One new message! spam

One new message! spam Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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