Actual Advice Mallard

If you can't afford a condom then you can't afford kids

If you can't afford a condom  then you can't afford kids   Actual Advice Mallard

IF they cheat with you They'll cheat on you

IF they cheat with you  They'll cheat on you   Actual Advice Mallard

If you're making an embarassing purchase buy a birthday card at the same time and you can laugh it off as a gag gift

If you're making an embarassing purchase buy a birthday card at the same time and you can laugh it off as a gag gift  Actual Advice Mallard

If you loan someone 50 bucks and never hear from them again it was worth 50 bucks

If you loan someone 50 bucks and never hear from them again  it was worth 50 bucks   Actual Advice Mallard

if you are getting passed by cars on the right you are probably in the wrong lane

if you are getting passed by cars on the right you are probably 
in the wrong lane  Actual Advice Mallard

If you want to safely pick up a prostitute, Always ask that you want to take nude pics of her only. It is not illegal and an undercover cop would never agree.

If you want to safely pick up a prostitute, Always ask that you want to take nude pics of her only. It is not illegal and an undercover cop would never agree.  Actual Advice Mallard

Don't bother taking a video of fireworks You won't ever watch it and it's much better to live in the moment and enjoy them

Don't bother taking a video of fireworks  You won't ever watch it and it's much better to live in the moment and enjoy them    Actual Advice Mallard

If a girl doesn't make you wear a condom... she probably didn't make all the other guys wear one either.

If a girl doesn't make you wear a condom... she probably didn't make all the other guys wear one either.  Actual Advice Mallard

If a dvd won't let you skip the previews press stop twice then play. Skips to the beginning of the movie

If a dvd won't let you skip the previews press stop twice then play. Skips to the beginning of the movie  Actual Advice Mallard

If you want to pick up a girl keep your back straight and lift with your knees

If you want to pick up a girl keep your back straight and lift with your knees  Actual Advice Mallard